Beneath the surface
by The Opal Jade
Summary: Séba is a Jedi in training. She got to the Temple when she was five years old. That was too late. She is too far behind. But Master Obi-Wan sees more than what s on the surface. He sees a Jedi.
1. Default Chapter

Beneath me

Darkness. Pain. Lonely cries. That is all I remember. That is all I ever dream. 

I am a Jedi. I don t have nightmares. I don t have nightmares. Don t have nightmares. I am a Jedi. I don t have nightmares, don t have nightmares. I do not feel a thing. I only feel the Force. I don t have nightmares. I don t have any desire what so ever, I have no need. I am needless, desireless. My mind is blank and devoted to the Force, to the Jedi order. 

I can t stand it. I m meditating, saying the things that I should say to make it all better but it doesn t work. I can say that those feelings aren t there for a milion times. I have the persistance to do so. 

It is all a lie. I have been brought here when I was five years old. That is exactly four and a half years too late. 

By that time I have met anger, pain, love, jelaousy…..a whole bunch of feelings that a Jedi should never know. 

I am a Jedi. 

This is beneath me.

To feel. To cry. To wonder without any good reason. To wonder just because I feel like it. This is all so wrong. 

I can t let myself go. 

I must restrain my mind. I must set an example for the younger Padawans. The younger Padawans that have been here since babies who barely knew anything about the world. I can t be even compared to other Padawans my age. 

Is this fight in my mind going to last forever? I wonder. 

Today is my thirteenth birthday. If no Jedi Master or Knight does not choose me as his or hers Padawan……they will send me back to my home planet. Mayselib. 

I remember very little of it. 

Very little. 

Only the black skies, the neverending night. My mothers vibrant voice, her cries, my cries. 

I m afraid. Nobody ever wanted me as a Padawan. Nobody ever wanted to train with me in pair. I was always dependent on my mentors here, at the Temple. 

I don t want to go back to that horrid place. I know that it s evil and far away from the Republic. I have marks that prove it. On my arms, elbows….black thin lines with strange symbols. I had them all of my life. Nobody ever told me why they were there. I never asked. I never talked freely about my training or anything with the mentors as the other children did. 

Maybe that s what s wrong with me. 

This **is** what s wrong with me. I m supposed to meditate and to prepare for training today.  We are going to practice with our lightsabers (not the real ones offcourse, somebody would lose an arm) and we will try to use the force for something more than sencing feelings and colaborations.

Three Jedi Masters and one Jedi Knight will be there. Master Ksati-Bilaux, Master Obi-Wan Kenobi, Master Landé and Knight Farella. I have never met or seen any of them. They will choose their Padawans. I fear this so. The others in my group are ten to eleven years old. 

And they are all beyond me with their skill and knowledge. 

It s not my fault that I came here when I was five. It s not my fault that I can t stop the feelings that come to mind. 

It s not my fault. 

I remember what Master Yoda told us:»Mind of free you must be.» It was a long time ago. But still….I remember it vivid like the voice of all those people I do not know. I hear it often. I try to avoid them. They are nogthing, just ghosts of my past. 

The doors open. It s Jinnayannah, Padawan of Master Pandium. She was chosen when she was seven years old. 

«It s time.»

«I know.»

«If you are meant to do so, you shall become a Jedi.»

«And if I m not?»

«Then there is noghting left for you here.»

«I don t trust that.»

«You are not acting like a Jedi Padawan should. Stay calm.»

I went straight past her. It was easy for her to say the things she said. 

Even if she never got chosen……..her planet is mild and peacefull. Not at all like the darkness of Mayselib. 

I am here. Finnaly.

I take my lightasaber. Spin it around my hand. I m doing very well! 

But just a glimpse at the Jedi s that were looking at us made me lose my balance and I droped the damn thing. Burned my hand. The skin was torn out and blood came out. These lightsabers weren t as the ones we were using as little children. If this has been a real one-I would cut my arm off. 

I deserve not to be a Jedi. 

Master Windu who I didn t notice before came up to me and took a look at my hand. 

«You are thirteen today.»

«Yes Master Windu.»

«This may be your last day here.»

«I am aware of that Master Windu.»

He takes a good sympatetic look at me. 

«I think that it s best for you to heal that hand. It s hurt. Then we can discuss about other things.»

My heart started pounding. This does not look good. It never was good. 

«I prefer to end this training.»

«Alright then.»

He handed me my lightsaber. I took it and almost screamed. My torned hand was in great pain. 

I must focus, must focus. Must stay straight. Keep your mind clear. Everything else, every other sence, every other feeling is beneath you. 

Calm down. Calm down. 

Now we must exercize in pairs. I don t want to even think about this. I know that I will be humiliated, burned down as I always am. 

The young Padawan in front of me, Cleaven is powerful for his age. And arogant inspite of his training. 

How sad. 

And a little creep like that is going to be a Jedi. And I m going back to Mayselib to enjoy the endless nights that the planet has to offer. 

I could have got all the information on Mayselib that I would want from the library. But I don t dare to find out. Of the things that might wait for me back there. Nightmares in living flesh. Or metal.

Fear. A nuder feeling that is beneath me. Wrong. It s beneath a Jedi. I am not a Jedi, not by a long run. 

He starts first. I defend myself, barely. And he s doing it on purpose. To give me hope and then to burry it. I know all his tricks by now. There will be no suprise. Defeat isn t such a suprise, not anymore.

He got the lightsaber out of my hands, burning me even more with no bother. I was sent to meditate along with the others that were beaten. 

I can feel the wetness in my eyes. It s not because of the pain. It s the humiliation. 

I can see Master Windu s eyes. They are blank, leaving no space for prejudice. But he is not going to bend the rules for me. I m not that valuable. 

It s not fair. Anakin Skywalker was older than me when he came here. And he was chosen as a Padawan. 

All I need is a good teacher. And I know that I could and I will show my best wich is much better than anything shown there in that horrid room. 

I m not going back to Mayselib. If I must escape….I will. I ll live on the streets if necesary. I m not going back. What would my family say about it….I don t know them. But I know the things that would be said.

I went away as a little girl to become a Jedi. And now, eight years after that…..they would bring me back as a piece of junk that isn t good enough. 

Well I am good enough. Much better than anybody. And this is my final chance to prove it. 

A droid came nearer to wrap my hand.  Didn t even notice him. Didn t notice that my attire was all bloody. How am I going to show myself like that?!?

Stop. Clear your mind. Clear it. Make it feel all empty inside. Enjoy that emptyness. Feel it in yourself. This is you. That calmness, that emptyness is you. 

After meditaion is over we will get an assignment.  I don t know what is it going to be. 

Be calm. Clear your mind. Relax. Feel the emptyness. That emptyness is your life. Feel the Force. You must be empty to sence the Force, to take it in…

I m ready. 

I think. 

I sit down. A young child is in front of me. He smiles. I sence the Force in him. I think I sence the Force in him. He makes me feel calm. 

I do something that was wrong, so wrong. Can t I ever learn? 

I looked at the Jedi Masters and felt crumbled at the sight of them. 

Is this ever going to stop. I couldn t concetrate the way I should have. The glass ball we were meant to lift up in the air exploded. By my fault. Little pieces of it scratched my forehead. I feel little drops of blood on it, the feeling, I feel like a monster.

So I bow my head down. This is the end. No more hoping, no more dreaming. They will send me back to Mayselib. 

I got up and walked out of the room. 

Master Windu folowed me. 

«You are not going back to Mayselib if that s what you re afraid of.»

«I m not?»

«No. You can stay here. You won t be training to become a Jedi, but you can still be of help.»

This scenario seems much worse than going away to Mayselib. 

«I know that it s not easy…»

«It s not my fault that I wasn t brought here earlier!»

«I realise that but there is noghting that we can do now.»

«Then send me to Mayselib.»

«We won t do that.»

«Why not?»

«You never wondered about the planet so nobody ever told you.

Mayselib is a ruined planet. It s people, your people live on it as slaves. In the mines in wich they work, live and die. 

Those marks on you are plans. Plans for the replacement of your arms with droid ones, ones that they could control so that you would work the maximum amount of time and could not escape.»

He s always straight forward, he believes that I m ferm enough. Am I?

So. That cold metal touch that I remember. That was probably my mother.

And the darkness. Those were the mines. 

They took me far away from that place. But they can t put me back. And they can t leave me here. 

I don t belong here. I don t belong to this world. 

I don t belong anywhere.

Feelings like this are beneath a Jedi. 

Right now…..I m beneath myself. 

Master Windu was still here. He senced everything that was going on. 

«I can do better. I know I can. If I could just have a good mentor, I know I could be better than anyone from that room, I could be much better. 

I just need a second chance.»

«I m sorry Séba. There are no more chances.»

Just like that. It s easy for him to say «no more chances». 

This is it. I m quiting. There is nogthing more to do here. 

I can t let myself go just yet. I m forcing myself to, but……I can t. It s not natural. 

I can t give myself up. 

«Wait just a second there!», a voice behind me yells. Good news, I hope. 

«Master Windu.»

«Master Obi-Wan.»

«I would like to spend the day with this young girl. I believe that she would prove to be a good Padawan.»

I m saved. I don t know how can I ever thank him. 

Master Windu smiled, «I m glad you believe so Master Obi-Wan.

Séba, do you agree with this?»

«Yes Master Windu, I do agree.»

He turned and walked away. I have a second chance. Now I can prove myself. I wonder what does Master Obi-Wan see in me.

«Séba. That is your name?»

«Yes Master Obi-Wan.»

«And today you are thirteen years old.»

«Yes Master Obi-Wan.»

«This is your last chance. You realize that?»

«Yes I do Master Obi-Wan.»

«You should change your clothes. It s all covered with blood.»

«No thank you Master Obi-Wan, I m okay.»

«Is your hand alright?»

«It is Master Obi-Wan»

«It doesn t look like that.»

«Many things don t look the way they really are Master Obi-Wan.»

«They don t?  Interesting to hear that from a Padawan. Maybe you could teach me a thing or two.

You can lift your head up. I don t bite.»

«Thank you Master Obi-Wan.»

«I would like to take you to a place if I may to check up on something. We should…»

«Offcourse Master Obi-Wan.»

Stops for a moment before he continues, «You didn t seem this obedient when I saw you in training.»

«I had no reason to be obedient Master Obi-Wan.»

«I m glad you find reason for it now.»

«Thank you Master Obi-Wan.»

«From where do you come from?»

«From a planet called Mayselib.»

«Mayselib, isn t that…?»

«Yes Master Obi-Wan, that is the planet where people live as slaves.»

«There s more.»

«Yes Master Obi-Wan, I know.»

«How old were you when you came here?»

«I was five years old Master Obi-Wan.»

«You are far behind.»

«I realise that Master Obi-Wan.»

«Are you prepared to give everything that you can to become a Jedi.»

«Yes Master Obi-Wan, I am.»

«I believe you. The Force is strong in you.»

I look at him in disbelief.

«I know that nobody probably told you that, but...there aren t a lot of Padawans like you. Not many of them would still keep going after hurting themselfes in that way.»

«Thank you Master Obi-Wan. But I am still not a Padawan.»

«You are now. I m not going to let you be sent back to Mayselib.»

So I m going to be his Padawan for the sole reason of his feeling of sorow over me and my life back there. Droid arms, maybe legs, who knows? 

Why doesn t the Republic free Mayselib?

I have a feeling that they can t. 

«I am not making you a Padawan from sorow. It is because I believe you truly could be a great Jedi Master.»

«Thank you Master Obi-Wan.»

«I shall not say this again: lift your head up. I don t bite.»

«Yes Master Obi-Wan. I m sorry.»

«Follow me.»

I didn t ask where to. 

I m a Padawan. 

I AM a JEDI in TRAINING. 

I am a Padawan. 

I thought that everything is going to end. But now…..I have a new begining in front of me.

A new mentor. I don t know where is he taking me. But I trust him. He brings trust in me. And I know that from now on there is noghting that I won t be able to do. 

And feelings of rejection, lonelyness….they don t egsist anymore. They are all beneath a Jedi.

They are all beneath me.

A/N: Well this is interesting. My second Star Wars fic. Feel free to flame **but**-in the form of constructive critism only.

I ll keep going with this one (I think). If not-it s good just the way it is. 

If somebody out there is wondering:

-this fic **will not** contain any romances between Séba and Obi-Wan

-this is my version of what could go on in Episode 3


	2. chapter two

I fall down. Barely get back up. I can t hold on like this any longer. 

Did Master Kenobi make a huge mistake by taking me here? This is a mission. A very dangerous one. And I don t even know how to properly use a lightsaber. I have a real one now. Damn it. I will probably cut my arm off. Save the slave drivers of Mayselib some bother. 

This mud is slippery. What was this planet called anyway? Tarakua? Or was it Tarambua? Tarasua? I dont think so. It doesn t matter. It bears no significant importance to my prime goal wichh is to stay alive. And to catch the droid smuglers.

I m afraid. I shouldn t be afraid. It is wrong. 

But hell…..maybe it will send the adrenaline through my veines. 

I close my eyes to rest for awhile. Open them up. And keep going Séba. Before we got here Master Obi-Wan told me to follow my instincts. That is my advantage. I don t know how did he conclude that. It s better for me to follow his lead. 

I climp the mountain. Finnaly. I look over the terrain only to find the man we were looking for right beneath me. I could spit on him if I weren t such a proper little Jedi. 

I am a Jedi Padawan. 

Still getting used to the idea. 

My first instinct was to use my lightsaber, but…….there is a posibility of hurting myself. If I jump down without it, the man, Jambo Argelio may be too suspicious in the fact that I am a Jedi. 

A Jedi Padawan….he doesn t have to know that. 

I ll take my chance. I don t see or sence a weapon of some sort anywhere. 

As soon as I jump to the ground I ll…..slip. Slip?!?  A Jedi does not slip and crack his or hers own jaw when in pursute of a criminal! Good thing that I didn t pull out the saber. I would cut myself up, not just one limb but whole body.

Jambo escapes. This is a very successful mission. I think that Master Kenobi is somwhere hiding so that he can see how do I carry myself in combat. 

Very badly if you ask me. 

The man, Jambo takes out a speeder. There are more of them. So I follow. This is the first time that I m driving a speeder on my own. Why didn t Master Kenobi just take me somwhere where we wouldn t be on a mission? Somwhere where my jaw would stay intact and well, not snaped like a twig. 

We re gonna play cat and mouse for awhile, I see. 

I pretend like I ve lost him but I could sence exactly where he was. It s working. He s leading me straight to his ship.

There were a whole lot of battle droids there, but he was just delivering them. That means that they must not be damaged. I hope that he s not going to engage them. He won t. 

I think. 

Master Kenobi didn t have a chance to follow me. I think that he didn t. So…..I m on my own. 

I m doing pretty good with driving and all…..but now is a time to focus. 

Focus Séba, focus. Stay calm, stay blank, accept the Force.

I jump out of the speeder and realise something: Jambo isn t alone. 

There are three more creatures of somesort, they appear to be humanoid lizards.

Instead of fighting me, they get down to their knees. Now I m really confused.  But no matter what I m on the upper hand. They fear me, maybe this is the first time they have seen a Jedi. Maybe it s something else. 

They were beggin me to spear their lives. I know this because I can understand almost every single word of it. But how can this be? 

«We are your humble servants, we do not mean you no harm.»

Jambo looked up by their example and stayed in place, he realises that now I am the master of their life or death. I look at the ship that should take off with the droids. I use the Force. 

Destination: Mayselib. 

Now we re going somewhere. These lizards are the species that enslaved my people back on Mayselib. This is why Master Kenobi brought me here. They fear me. They fear their own slaves. As I understood…..nobody can escape. And now….they see me here. A Jedi. Very interesting. I ll try to speak their language. I think I can do that.

«So…..you come from Mayselib?»

«Yes Mistress.»

Mistress? This is new. How strong do they think I am?

«I am from Mayselib also. Maybe we have some common friends.»

They are silent.

«Oh, I forgot-my friends are working as slaves for your fat asses.»

This is just a test. I want to see where does that fear go, where are it s limits. Is it endless?

«We want to apologize for everything that s been done. We will make it better. We will….»

«Silence!»

«Yes mistress.»

«My name is Séba.»

Their eyes fill up with horor. Master Windu told me how hard it was to get me off of Mayselib. It took ten Jedi Knights and three Jedi Masters. But they were victorious. I still don t understand why couldn t they free Mayselib then?

I m probably well known as the only one that got out. They know who stands behind me. That s a delight. 

«Did you ever hear of me? Séba? Anything. Because a very interresting thing happened about eight years ago.»

«Yes mistress, we have heard of your magnificent reputation.»

Magnificent? They are really desperate. 

I hear steps behind me. It s Master Kenobi. He takes his saber out as well. The creatures panic.

«We have heard all about your bravery and all your glory and we would be honoured to….»

«Quiet.»

«You understand them?»

«They come from Mayselib Master Obi-Wan.»

«Yes, I know that. I was hoping that you can speak the language. 

I can t say that there were no mistakes but as far as your survival skills go…»

He was speaking of my actions, judging them, «….it s pretty good. Now we must take them to custody and to the Republic.»

«Offcourse Master Obi-Wan.»

«Are you alright? I suspect that the bone may be broken.»

«I am alright Master Obi-Wan.»

«Then tell them to give themselfes up. If not….we shall be forced to use our lightsabers.»

I never knew that a Mayselibian vessle can be so complicated to control. Master Kenobi took it upon himself to get us to the Republic while I was guarding the prisoners. 

«Master Obi-Wan? Can I ask you a question if I may?»

«Offcourse my young Padawan. Just make it short. We both must concentrate.»

He called me a Padawan. 

«Why are they so scared?»

«It s their natural trate. They know that they have been doing something wrong and that they will stand trial…»

«Not that Master Obi-Wan. I was wondering why are they so scared of me?»

«You don t know?»

«Know what Master Obi-Wan?»

«When we arrive back to the Temple you shall not be allowed to follow me on missions until you complete your knowledge about Mayselib in the library.»

«Yes Master Obi-Wan.»

I never liked the library. It s so cold. Not cold in a phisical sence but it feels cold and it s full of creepy old ladies. 

I sit down and enter the key word: Mayselib.

I get multiple links:                           

«Mayselib:

Term

Planet

Nebula

People

Animals

Plants»

For the first time in my life I am seeing how my home planet looks like. It is beautiful. But it never was peaceful. The two races that lived on it were always fighting. The lizard humanoids called Batix and the more peaceful Sébahians whose name is based on the ancient deity called Séba. She was a godess of bravery and delight. She sacrificed her life to save her people. After she died…..Batix ruled over the helpless Sébahians. 

It says here that the data on the planet is incomplete. The picture of it is few centuries old. No probe can get near it. 

It s a very dangerous place. 

«The Sébahians are very interesting humanoids that Batix feared before they concored them. 

Their eye color changes with their state of mind. This serves to confuse the oponents, scare them away and it also serves for purposes of camoflauge and comunication. The last purpose of comunication has yet to be proved. It probably is a form of empathy. 

There are more differences between Sébahians and tradicional humans. Like the form and shape of their tongue wich is snake like but thicker. This is probably as a result of common ancestors that were lizards. Nobody has put a theory about the purpose of this feature. Maybe it is necesary in some other actions than just digestion of food. 

Their skin is silk because it is washed over with various types of poison. It is believed that they can learn to control this state wich has developed because of it s importance during defending.

When reaching a mature age, a young Sébahian will have it s teeth and nailes replaced with stronger ones. To many they will seem as the living embodyments of an old Earth legend of creatures known as vampires.

Their brain is a special matter. It is developed but fully awake in certain actions. They have a developed, natural empathic conection to nature, that is why many scientists are likely to believe that many of Sébahians would make good Jedi Masters. This theory has yet to be proven. 

The only known Sébahian living outside of the planet Mayselib is Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi s Padawan called Séba.»

Wow. I didn t know that I was so powerful. That is why those creeps were afraid of me. We are rivaling species. And I am much more powerful than any Batix. Now I understand. 

I didn t know why was the color of my eyes changing most of the time. I had no idea that I will have fangs. Or that there is poison on my skin. I must have learned to control it when I was still on Mayselib.

There was nogthing here about the slavery. I probably require the pasword for that. 

 I need to meditate on this. To get everything in balance. 

I must meditate.

Keep my mind blank. I must stay in the clear of all I am thinking. I must not make asumptions. My mind must be clear. 

I must focus.

It is near.

It is almost complete.

What am I saying?

What is this strange field of energy?

It is almost complete.

The star of death.

What?

I do not understand.

My mind must be roaming around.

Again.

I must focus. Ignore that wich is not necesary. 

I must be blank. 


End file.
